• Author / Uploaded
• Ajay Kumar

• Categories
• Empatía
• Las emociones
• Autosuperación
• Conceptos psicologicos
• Sicología y ciencia cognitiva

Citation preview

SKILL CARDS

© FranklinCovey.

LEA131355 Version 1.2.4

SITUATION 1

Your client schedules an important meeting that conflicts with a personal commitment you’ve made.

Proactive Language • There might be a way to do both. • Let me explore all of my options. • I choose to reschedule my personal commitment/ the client meeting.

Reactive Language: • Now I have to cancel my plans. • This client makes me so angry! I always have to reschedule things for them.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 2

Someone important to you accuses you of taking him or her for granted. He or she tells you that you don’t say thank you enough.

Proactive Language • I’m sorry. I really do appreciate everything you do. • You’re probably right. I will say thank you more often. • I’m sorry. How could I better express my appreciation for all you do?

Reactive Language: • That’s not true! I always say thank you. • I can’t help it. It’s just not my style to say thank you. • It’s not my fault you need to hear thank you so much. © FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 3

Your boss blames you for a report your co-workers are responsible for.

Proactive Language • I’m sorry. I think there’s been a miscommunication with my team. Let me investigate and I’ll get back to you. • Let me get the team that wrote the report together so that we can address the problems. • If you have a minute to show me the problems with the report, I will communicate them to the team that is responsible for it.

Reactive Language: • It’s not my fault! Go talk to Jim. • I can’t do anything about it. I didn’t write that report. • I always get blamed for everyone else’s mistakes.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 4

Your boss just added three more deliverables but won’t increase your resources.

Proactive Language • Let’s look at all our options to meet those deliverables. • What resources do I have that I haven’t thought of? • Let’s find ways to make this work rather than all the reasons we can’t.

Reactive Language: • There’s no way. I can’t do it. • You always expect me to do more with less! • Now I have to work even harder.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 5

You’re meeting a friend for lunch and she or he is 20 minutes late... again. You are on a very tight schedule and are becoming increasingly annoyed.

Proactive Language • I’ll order lunch for us and will take mine with me so I can spend some time with you. • (You call your friend and say) What would you like for lunch? I’ll order yours so it’s here when you arrive. • Let’s spend 10 minutes together before I head back to work.

Reactive Language: • You’re always late, and now I have to rush my lunch! • Now I don’t have time to eat because you are late. • I have to skip lunch now.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 6

You are working with a co-worker on a project due at the end of the day. You quickly realize he or she has not done the pre-work necessary to complete the project on time.

Proactive Language • I’m concerned that this won’t get done by the end of the day. Let’s look at our options to get the information we need. • Let’s focus on how this happened later. For now, let’s see how we can get this completed on time.

Reactive Language: • We’re going to miss our deadline and it’s all your fault. • You always do this! You are so irresponsible. • There’s nothing we can do. There’s no way we can make it. © FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 7

You are stuck in traffic due to road construction. Because of this, you are going to be late for an important meeting.

Proactive Language • Next time, I will check the traffic report and leave earlier. • I can take this time to mentally prepare for the meeting. • I can call ahead to see what other arrangements we can make.

Reactive Language: • Everything bad always happens to me! • It’s not my fault. I didn’t know about the construction. • I am such a loser!

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 8

After rearranging your meetings and taking transit across town, you arrive at the dentist’s office to find they don’t have your appointment in their schedule book.

Proactive Language • I am confident we can work this out. • Let’s look at all our options. How could the dentist fit me in? • Here’s what I think we could do.

Reactive Language: • It’s not my fault you can’t keep your appointments straight. • I have so much to do and I had to rearrange my whole schedule to get here. • You are really frustrating me! © FranklinCovey.

YOUR SITUATION 1

Proactive Language

Reactive Language:

© FranklinCovey.

YOUR SITUATION 2

Proactive Language

Reactive Language:

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 1

My colleague repeatedly takes credit for my work. (Emotion: Irritation)

Empathic Responses (Reflect feelings and words.)

FEELINGS



• Sounds like you’re irritated.

WORDS



• Y  our co-worker is taking credit for your work.

FEELINGS AND WORDS



• W  hat I’m hearing is that your co-worker takes credit for your work and that upsets you.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 2

I’m overwhelmed by the amount of work my boss is giving me. (Emotion: Frustration)

Empathic Responses (Reflect feelings and words.)

FEELINGS



• You sound frustrated.

WORDS



• Y  ou’re overwhelmed by the amount of work your boss gives you.

FEELINGS AND WORDS



• Y  ou feel frustrated about the amount of work you have.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 3

My brother-in-law ruins every family get-together. (Emotion: Frustration)

Empathic Responses (Reflect feelings and words.)

FEELINGS



• You seem frustrated.

WORDS



• Y  ou’re saying that your brother-in-law ruins every family get-together.

FEELINGS AND WORDS



• Y  ou feel frustrated about your brother-in-law’s behavior.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 4

I just lost my job. (Emotion: Worry)

Empathic Responses (Reflect feelings and words.)

FEELINGS



• You sound really worried.

WORDS



• You lost your job.

FEELINGS AND WORDS



• Y  ou sound really concerned about losing your job.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 5

It’s a waste of time to do these reports; nobody even reads them! (Emotion: Annoyed)

Empathic Responses (Reflect feelings and words.)

FEELINGS



• You sound annoyed.

WORDS



• Y  ou’re creating reports nobody reads.

FEELINGS AND WORDS



• Y  ou feel annoyed that you are spending time on reports nobody reads.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 6

I made a mistake and my supervisor reprimanded me in front of the whole team! (Emotion: Embarrassment)

Empathic Responses (Reflect feelings and words.)

FEELINGS



• S  ounds like you were embarrassed.

WORDS



• Y  our supervisor reprimanded you in front of your team.

FEELINGS AND WORDS



• Y  ou’re embarrassed that your supervisor reprimanded you in front of your whole team.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 7

I think my colleague may be stealing from the company. (Emotion: Concern)

Empathic Responses (Reflect feelings and words.)

FEELINGS



• You sound very concerned.

WORDS



• Y  ou think your colleague is stealing from the company.

FEELINGS AND WORDS



• Y  ou’re concerned that your colleague is stealing from the company.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 8

I just got promoted to team leader. (Emotions: Hesitation and concern)

Empathic Responses (Reflect feelings and words.)

FEELINGS



• Y  ou sound a little hesitant and concerned.

WORDS



• Y  ou just got promoted to team leader.

FEELINGS AND WORDS



• Y  ou have mixed feelings about being promoted to team leader.

© FranklinCovey.

YOUR SITUATION 1

Empathic Responses (Reflect feelings and words.)

FEELINGS

WORDS

FEELINGS AND WORDS

© FranklinCovey.

YOUR SITUATION 2

Empathic Responses (Reflect feelings and words.)

FEELINGS

WORDS

FEELINGS AND WORDS

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 1

I got some really tough feedback on a presentation I gave last week. (Emotion: Defeated)

Empathic Response: You sound defeated by the feedback you got on your presentation. Speaker: Yeah.

Clarifying Questions (Stay with the subject the speaker brought into the conversation.)



• W  hen you say you got tough feedback, what do you mean?



• C  an you tell me more about that?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 2

We just decided to make a big investment in this project, and I think it’s a bad decision. (Emotion: Concern)

Empathic Response: You sound concerned about the decision to invest in this project. Speaker: I am.

Clarifying Questions (Stay with the subject the speaker brought into the conversation.)



• W  hen you say you think it’s a bad decision, what do you mean?



• Can you tell me more about that?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 3

I’m having such a hard time with my family. (Emotion: Worry)

Empathic Response: You’re concerned because you’re having a hard time with your family. Speaker: Yeah.

Clarifying Questions (Stay with the subject the speaker brought into the conversation.)



• When  you say you’re having a hard time, what do you mean?



• Can you tell me more about that?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 4

None of the staff know how to use the database. We need to do more training! (Emotion: Frustration)

Empathic Response: You sound frustrated that none of the staff know how to use the database. Speaker: I am.

Clarifying Questions (Stay with the subject the speaker brought into the conversation.)



• When  you say none of the staff know how to use the database, what do you mean?



• W  hen you say we need to do more training, what does that look like?



• C  an you tell me more about that?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 5

My daughter has been skipping school. I’m so angry with her! (Emotion: Anger)

Empathic Response: You’re angry that your daughter’s been skipping school. Speaker: I am.

Clarifying Questions (Stay with the subject the speaker brought into the conversation.)



• When  you say she’s been skipping school, what do you mean?



• C  an you tell me more about that?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 6

I think we’re going to lose money on this deal, but Sales is running with it. (Emotion: Concern)

Empathic Response: You seem worried that Sales is running with this deal and you think we’ll lose money on it. Speaker: Yeah.

Clarifying Questions (Stay with the subject the speaker brought into the conversation.)



• When  you say you think we’ll lose money on this deal, what do you mean?



• C  an you tell me more about that?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 7

The customers are all mad at us, but no one seems to care. (Emotion: Defeat)

Empathic Response: No one seems to care that the customers are mad at us. Speaker: Yeah.

Clarifying Questions (Stay with the subject the speaker brought into the conversation.)



• When  you say no one seems to care, what does that mean?



• C  an you tell me more about that?



• W  hen you say the customers are all mad at us, what do you mean?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 8

I’m really concerned that our Marketing team is not connected to our Sales force. (Emotion: Worry)

Empathic Response: You sound concerned that Marketing and Sales aren’t connected. Speaker: Yeah.

Clarifying Questions (Stay with the subject the speaker brought into the conversation.)



• When  you say the Marketing team isn’t connected to the Sales force, what does that mean?



• C  an you tell me more about that?

© FranklinCovey.

YOUR SITUATION 1

__________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ (Emotion: ______________)

Empathic Response: You feel about . Speaker: Yeah.

Clarifying Questions (Stay with the subject the speaker brought into the conversation.)



• 



• 



? ?

• C  an you tell me more about that?

© FranklinCovey.

YOUR SITUATION 2

__________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ (Emotion: ______________)

Empathic Response: You feel about . Speaker: Yeah.

Clarifying Questions (Stay with the subject the speaker brought into the conversation.)



• 



• 



? ?

• C  an you tell me more about that?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 1

You are working with a client who consistently has unclear and changing expectations and then is dissatisfied with your work. You’ve just worked through the weekend to create a presentation for them, only to find they had something else in mind. You’re quite frustrated and worried this reflects poorly on you. Client: That’s not what I thought you’d come up with at all. I was hoping for something different.

Empathic Response: You’re disappointed because you expected something different. State Your Point of View Using “I” Messages: • I’m sorry you are disappointed. I’d like to take a minute to review my understanding of your expectations for this project. Could we do that?

• I feel confused, because I thought I understood your expectations for this project. I have a different point of view I’d like to share. May I?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 2

You’ve organized the office party the past three years and it’s a lot of work. You’re extremely busy with year-end reports and would prefer not to do it again.

Boss: I’ve put you in charge of the office party again this year.

Empathic Response: You’d like me to be in charge of the party again this year. State Your Point of View Using “I” Messages: • I feel concerned about being assigned the party again with the year-end reports due. I’d prefer not to be in charge again this year.

• T  hank you for your confidence in me. The party is a lot of work, and based on my experience, it will interfere with the timely submission of the year-end reports. I think it would be best if you assigned it to someone else.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 3

A conversation is important to you, but every time you begin to state your point of view, you are interrupted.

Team member, interrupting: Yes, yes, I know. Here’s what I think we should do...

Empathic Response: I can tell you’re very excited about your idea. State Your Point of View Using “I” Messages: • Before we go there, could I finish my thought?

• I really appreciate your enthusiasm. Would you be willing to listen to my idea?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 4

Every time you try to introduce new ideas about how to structure work flow, you encounter a lot of resistance. This has been going on for some time now, and you are reaching your limit!

Team members: But we’ve always done it this way.

Empathic Response: You are satisfied with the way we do it now. State Your Point of View Using “I” Messages: • I’m disappointed with the resistance I feel each time I share this idea. I believe we could significantly improve these processes. Would you be willing to hear me out before responding?

• I understand your point of view. I’d like to share mine too. Will that work for you?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 5

One of the managers in your company often pushes for cost-cutting measures, even when the project plans are within budget. You’ve got all the research to show that the full-service option is both within budget and what the client wants, but you feel like the manager isn’t listening to you. Manager: I think the full-service option isn’t worth the cost. Let’s go with the standard version for this client instead.

Empathic Response: You’re concerned about cost. State Your Point of View Using “I” Messages: • I’m concerned we haven’t fully discussed the justification for the full-service option. Before we make a decision, may I share my point of view?

• W  ould you be willing to hear my recommendation before coming to a decision? The full-service option pays for itself within a year, and the client wants it. I think it would be a mistake not to use it.

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 6

One of your co-workers tends to gossip and thinks everyone agrees with him. This promotes a negative and reactive work environment. You’ve just completed The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and are practicing being proactive. You’d like to be a Transition Person and break the negative pattern. Co-worker: I’m so tired of how everyone is treated differently here. It’s not fair! Did you hear about...?

Empathic Response: You think how people are treated here is unfair. State Your Point of View Using “I” Messages: • I can see what you mean when you say it feels unfair. I have a different point of view I’d like to share.

• I want to understand your point of view, even if I don’t share it. Would you be willing to hear my thoughts too?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 7

Your department has been understaffed for nearly a year, and your manager puts you off whenever you petition for a new hire. The stress is affecting your physical health, and you’re afraid some of your employees are on the verge of quitting. Manager: Let’s wait until next quarter to decide whether it’s time to bring someone else on the team. I’m just too swamped right now to go through a bunch of interviews.

Empathic Response: You’re overwhelmed and would like to wait another quarter before addressing the understaffing issue. State Your Point of View Using “I” Messages: • I understand that interviews take a lot of time. Would you be willing to hear me out before you make this decision?

• I appreciate your thoughts. Could I share my concerns about the impact the chronic understaffing is having?

© FranklinCovey.

SITUATION 8

You’ve just completed your performance review, and you’ve done really well for the second year in a row. You want to ask for a raise, but you’re scared to advocate for yourself.

Supervisor: You’ve done a great job this year. Thanks for all you do.

Empathic Response: You’re really pleased with my performance. State Your Point of View Using “I” Messages: • Thank you for your confidence in my performance. Based on my positive performance review, I’d like to discuss increasing my compensation.

• I’m honored that you are pleased with my work here. I would like to discuss my compensation package. Would you be willing to listen to my proposal?

© FranklinCovey.

YOUR SITUATION 1

__________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________

________________: .

Empathic Response: You feel about State Your Point of View Using “I” Messages: • 

•



• 



• 

© FranklinCovey.

.

YOUR SITUATION 2

__________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________ __________________________

________________: .

Empathic Response: You feel about State Your Point of View Using “I” Messages: • 

•



• 



• 

© FranklinCovey.

.

© FranklinCovey.