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“​How to Pass Shit Tests” Mario Singelmann, the “GetGameGuy” Get Game Group Dating Coaching for Men and Women Copyright © 2016 by Get Game Group, LLC

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Website [email protected] (800) 965-0554

“Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the mouth.” Mike Tyson Former Boxing Heavyweight Champion World’s Youngest Boxing Heavyweight Champion

Shit Tests are a good thing. They mean the person you’re interested in has standards. And only the worthy shall pass. -GetGameGuy Whatsup everyone, Mario the “GetGameGuy” here. I know attraction and dating can seem complicated, but they don’t have to be. I wrote this ebook to help you, and others, make sense of Shit Tests because well, you can’t escape them! Shit Tests are everywhere. Your personal life, but also in your professional life too, so this information has social and business applications. Beyond your romantic interests, your friends, family, coworkers, and job interviewers...they can all shit test you. Unfamiliar with “Shit Tests,” and/or how to handle them? Don’t worry, in this ebook we will cover the knowledge you need to handle them with flying colors. I’ll walk you through understanding them, so we can take the fear from the unknown and misunderstood, and then I’ll share with you how to handle them with Game. I do enjoy connecting with everyone, so feel free to reach out and introduce yourself. If there’s anything you’d like to see covered next, reach out and let me know! Also, be sure to check out all the great things we’re putting out with Get Game Group. We have a great website www.getgamegroup.com​ with tons of articles about all things dating and Game, “Insider” content like this ebook available for free to Get Game Group Insiders (signup is free), and be sure to check out our budding YouTube channel.

- Mario, the “GetGameGuy” CEO and Dating Coach at Get Game Group Dating Coaching [email protected]

TABLE OF CONTENTS 1. W ​ hat is a Shit Test 2. ​When a Woman Shit Tests a Man… 3. ​Women Have a More Highly Developed Sense of Intuition 4. ​Shit Test Analogy 5. ​Is it a Shit Test or Disinterest? 6. ​What Does a Shit Test Tell You? 7. ​How to Handle a Shit Test with Game 8. ​Wrapping Up 9. ​FREE Get Game Group Resources 10. Get Game Group Products 11. Get Game Group Services

What is a Shit Test? “Shit Test” ● A.K.A. - “Qualifying Test” ● A.K.A. - “Congruence Test” ● A.K.A. - “Quality Checks” Game Tip: ​Think of a Shit Test from a more positive perspective. Try calling it a “Qualifying,” or “Congruence,” Test. Sounds much less threatening now, right??

“Shit Test” definition: ● characteristically, a situation (during courtship) in which a ​female challenges a man’s ​inner frame​ for congruence with what he’s expressing both visually and verbally as his ​outer frame.

A Shit Test seeks to answer and expose: ● Are a person’s inner and outer frame congruent/aligned? ● Or, is the outer frame fake? An act?

Why do Shit Tests exist? For what purpose? Shit Tests exist because people lie. A Shit Test is a defense mechanism. It’s meant to protect one from deceit, harm, and pain.

When a Woman Shit Tests a Man... When a woman shit tests a man, she’s displaying interest. How to Interpret When a Woman’s Shit Tests a Man: She is interested in what his outer frame is displaying. But...she will feel greater comfort engaging and moving forward connecting with him if she becomes confident that what’s on the outside indeed matches what’s on the inside.

For example, if a man appears calm, cool, and confident around her, she might test his calm, cool confidence by challenging him, and even rejecting him at various levels. What she wants to know is, “Will he maintain his frame under fire? Will he remain unflappably calm and confident, or will weakness and insecurities reveal themselves?” Much like a job interview, a Shit Test seeks throw someone off their Game, make them improvise and react spontaneously and naturally to uncover a person’s true beliefs, values, and personality. Consider Shit Tests an interrogation tactic. If someone buckles under the pressure or scrutiny….it will be assumed they couldn’t keep up the act...​because it wasn’t really them in the first place.

Example Scenario: Let’s say we have a man and woman, and physical attraction is mutually acceptable. The man is displaying this calm, cool, confidence in his approach, and while opening her and attempting to start a conversation, this happens: Her:​ (select any example below) ● “You’re short.” ● “Are you gay?” ● “Why do you have that car, do you have a small penis??” ● “You’re too young for me.” ● “You’re too old for me.” ● “Why are you wearing that (insert clothing item or accessory)?”

What just happened? If we compare the above situation to a job interview, consider this. Do interviewers ever purposely ​want to waste their time? Or do they try to line up qualified candidates, hoping they will fit the position? You know this answer. They line up candidates to interview who they feel ​could fill the position, and bring value to the company. Even if they ask tough questions or challenge an interviewee, if they weren’t interested at all, you would already have been shown the door. Understand, if a woman is giving you her time, however briefly, she’s giving you a chance. There’s a glimmer of interest. Where men go wrong, is that while they ​will need to respond, they respond to a Shit Test as if a logical response is what is desired. It’s not.

It’s not actually what you say that matters, passing a Shit Test results from how you respond! Am I losing you? Confused a little? Consider this. How do you think James Bond would respond if a woman told him he was too short, or if you’re the Sean Connery James Bond, that your chest is ​really hairy!! Do you think James Bond would give a fuck to a woman saying “You’re short” or telling him his chest was really hairy?? Hell no! In his head, he’s cool with who he is, and even if this woman really does think he’s too short or hairy, well...he can leave the interaction knowing, “I’m ​still James Bond muthufuckas!!!” When the guy in any of the above scenarios is getting shit tested, it’s because the woman can’t just let this guy appear calm, cool, and confident for thirty seconds or five minutes, and accept that it really is him, no questions asked. Sure she could ask him, “Are you cool?” But what would any guy say?? He’d say, “Yes I’m cool!” But is he really cool?? Maybe, maybe not. After all, he could be lying, or putting on an act. The Shit Test acts as a measure to screen applicants for authenticity and other desirable traits. Will the guy in the above examples maintain his calm, cool, confident demeanor...or will he buckle under the pressure, get rattled, and display weakness and insecurity of a lesser man? Again,​ how he responds will determine if he passes the Shit Test, not what he says. We will cover this in detail in the final section of this ebook, “How to Handle a Shit Test with Game.”

Women Have a More Highly Developed Sense of Intuition Anyone can perform a Shit Test on you. Male, female, young, old, friend, foe, family, coworkers...Shit Tests can occur with anyone you interact with in life. But as it relates to attraction, we need to identify why women, in particular, are different. Women, more than men, are about their feelings. This connection to feelings allows them to sense their environment differently. If we were creating a video game character, a woman’s attributes on a scale of 100, would generally be in the 80 and up range for Intuition. This is just their genetic hardwiring, their “advantage.” Evolution at play here. A man’s video game character would have advantages with other attributes like Strength and Size, but overall, a typical male video game character would score in the 40-70 range for Intuition. Again, this is just evolution. Men and women have different strengths and weaknesses.

Naturally, and generally speaking, women have a better sense of intuition to sense bullshit, liars, and phonies. They’re like natural private investigators, or the people that conduct lie detector tests, without needing the machine!

Sure, women can still be fooled. No one’s perfect, and sometimes anyone is susceptible to seeing and believing what they want to, but go ahead and

concede that​ women have a better sense of intuition, and this makes them more powerful Shit Test adversaries. A woman’s more developed intuition has a definite purpose. It helps her bullshit radar go off to become suspicious of if a man is lying or cheating. And it definitely goes off when a new guy approaches her and seems to be acting one way, but she just has this feeling, a suspicion, that it’s not necessarily who he really is. She may very well​ want him to be what he’s representing, but the Shit Test will help her become comfortable believing she’s not wasting her time on something false, because men are often liars. Men lie all the time to women.

Examples of lies men tell to women: ● ● ● ● ● ● ●

“My dick is ‘X’ big.” “Babe, I’m not seeing anyone but you.” “We should have sex because we’re going to be married anyway.” “You’re the only girl for me.” “No, I didn’t sleep with her.” “I was just out with the boys last night.” “I was just working late.”

And the kicker, perhaps a man’s worst lie…. “I love you.” This more developed sense of intuition is a woman’s defense against the falsehoods of men. Admittedly, a very necessary defense.

Shit Test Analogy If you were at the store and a new product caught your eye and you were considering making a purchase, Shit Tests are like conducting a quality check first. Before purchasing the product, you want to know if it ​really is the quality you think (and hope) it is. If it didn’t catch your attention as something you maybe wanted, you wouldn’t bother, and you’d keep walking, but you’re curious. You want to know, “Is this what I think, ​or hope, it is? Because I only want it if it’s legit.” You might take the item out of the box, squeeze it, give it a shake, check to see if it falls apart easily, or if the decoration rubs off easily. As we all know, many products may initially appear to be of the highest quality, but the outside doesn’t always reflect what is on the inside! Upon closer inspection, this can be revealed. If it passes your inspection, you might go into a higher stage of inspection, but you’re still hoping it continues to check out. You’re putting effort in, spending your time and energy...you don’t want to do this just to be wrong and have wasted your time. You’re pulling for the product to be legit! But since you’re still not convinced, maybe the next stage of your vetting process is to pull out your smartphone and Google it. Does it have good reviews? Does it have endorsements you would trust? The point is, you research to “Quality Check,” to find out more about something you ​would want...to find out if it continues to check out. People don’t quality check or research products they don’t want, and people don’t shit test others if they’re not intrigued.

Is It a Shit Test or Disinterest? Wondering if you are experiencing a Shit Test, or is it just a display of disinterest and contempt for your existence? Look to your conversation for clues as to the other person’s mindset. That’s what a person with Game does!

IN PERSON, you have the benefit of concrete, physical, and visible clues like: ● Proximity ○ Is she comfortable with the distance between you two? ○ Is she getting closer, or ok with you getting closer? ○ Is she creating more distance, stepping away some?

● Body Language ○ ○ ○ ○

Arms and/or legs crossed (unease) Arms and/or legs open (sign of ease) Facing you Giving you just a side profile

● Eye Contact ○ Holding eye contact ○ Avoiding eye contact ○ Looking away

● Interest/Disinterest in the Conversation ○ Is she adding to the conversation, or is it one-sided? ○ Is she helping the conversation continue, or looking for it to end without resistance? ■ Is she asking you questions?

■ Is she easily distracted and engaging with anything other than you? ○ Is she offering short, simple responses (bad sign) ■ “Sure” ■ “Ok” ■ “Yeah” ○ Is she offering more complicated responses that share more? ○ Is she appearing to be try to distance herself from the interaction, and make an exit?

Compared to in person interactions, Online Dating and text messaging offer less concrete clues as to mindset. So when you deal with online or text message Shit Tests, it’s trickier, but still possible to navigate your way through them successfully. There are still clues available, you just have to look harder, know how and where to identify these clues, and know how to disseminate what the clues are actually saying. Where do you find these clues? There’s only one place. Within your text communication.

WITH ONLINE DATING, OR TEXT MESSAGING, look for clues within text communication like: ● Is there a softening of any criticism, demonstrating playfulness, or teasing (instead of “just criticism”)? ○ Examples of ways to “soften” a messages tone: ■ Emoji use ■ “Hahaha” ■ “lol” ■ Excessive punctuation ● “???” ● “!!!”

● “?!?!”

● Timing of Communication ○ Is the person’s communication minimal, sporadic, and/or delayed? ○ Or is communication consistent, and/or timely?

● Interest/Disinterest in the Conversation (SAME AS IN PERSON) ○ Is she adding to the conversation, or is it one-sided? ○ Is she helping the conversation continue, or looking for it to end without resistance? ■ Is she asking you questions? ■ Is she easily distracted and engaging with anything other than you? ○ Is she offering short, simple responses (bad sign) ■ “Sure” ■ “Ok” ■ “Yeah” ○ Is she offering more complicated responses that share more? ○ Is she appearing to be try to distance herself from the interaction, and make an exit?

Ultimately, you can’t ever be sure of what someone else is thinking. But the practice of looking for clues to make a better Game decision/move is always a strategy to win more, lose less, and minimize potential for rejection, failure, and pain.

What Does a Shit Test Tell You? At its core, a Shit Test is an “Indicator of Interest,” sometimes referred to as an “IOI.” This is a good thing! When you realize you’re being shit tested, don’t get upset. Why? Because it is actually a blessing in disguise, giving you information about the other person.

A Shit Test is ​really telling you: 1) “I have a level of interest. I’m intrigued, but...” 1. “...I don’t want to waste my time.” 2. “...I don’t want to get hurt.” 3. “...I could be wrong.” The only reason for shit testing is because someone wants to know something. They’re interested to a degree. There is a level of insecurity on display, because a person doesn’t fully trust their current feelings or judgment towards you. Understand that a Shit Test is an opportunity to alleviate a person’s negative suspicions about you. Instead of thinking of a Shit Test as an obstacle, welcome the opportunity to do ​them a favor by putting their suspicions at ease.

2) “I’m offering you an opportunity to increase your perceived value.” If you handle the Shit Test appropriately, by remaining consistent and grounded to your frame, your stock will go up. Whatever they are seeing, it interests them. So if you can keep it up under the pressure of a Shit Test, pat yourself on the back, you’ve just upped your stock! If you stumble and/or fail, however, your stock and perceived value will plummet.

3) “Keep it up!! I like it!” Like a job interview, the interviewer likes what they’ve seen so far. If they didn’t, you would get the “Thanks for coming by, we’ll be in contact.” But instead you’re getting shit tested. A sign of interest! Your job is to continue delivering the same product on display (your personality), again and again. Are you coming across as cocky, witty, or smooth? Be prepared to be tested again and again, as if she’s testing your “act” with Shit Tests, observing your ability to improvise with whatever she throws at you and remain consistent and congruent to whatever frame is on display.

How to Handle a Shit Test with Game Good news! Handling a Shit Test is pretty much the same whether it’s “in person” or through an online dating site/text messaging. Instead of getting your panties in a bunch, or running away like a coward, engage one or more of the recommended Game strategies described in this section for dealing with Shit Tests and become someone’s hero who passes all tests with flying colors.

Strategy #1 Ignore, and continue the conversation in your desired direction. The simplest way to handle a Shit Test...is to ignore it! So what if you’re asked a shit testing question? Continue the conversation in your desired direction, without apologies! You might (rightfully) think, “How rude.” But this works because: A Shit Test is often a socially inappropriate question, and therefore, undeserving of a response.

The person shit testing you has a lot of nerve if they’re asking you highly personal questions like: ● ● ● ●

“Are you just looking for sex?” “Why did you break up with your ex? Did you cheat on them?” “So what do you do for a living?” “Do you have kids?”

Remember, someone is just now meeting and getting to know you! Even if they’re drop dead gorgeous, it shouldn’t mean that you place them on a pedestal and feel obligated to answer their every question, however private, inappropriate, or revealing, just because you want to impress them. Note: ​Just because a person asks you something worth ignoring doesn’t make them a bad person. It’s ok to give them another chance, and you should, because you will surely fuck up too, and deserve forgiveness and that second chance.

Strategy #2 Avoid responding to an identified Shit Test logically. The untrained man will have to practice resisting his natural instinct to respond logically, because that’s just what men do, but he ​must avoid this. The Shit Test “answer” lies within your behavior, in ​how you respond, not so much the content of your response. Don’t bother getting defensive or consumed with a logical response. Next is an example of a Shit Test, and we will take a look at the incorrect and correct response, focusing on the aspect of logic.

Example Shit Test “How many other people are you seeing right now?” Incorrect Response​: “Well I’m dating a three girls...but it’s nothing serious.” Logical response!!! You can’t win here. The conversation will continue along this thread. Not good. Do you really want to entertain this topic and have a conversation where you define and explain your dating life? You may also potentially lose points for expressing that these girls are “nothing serious” because you may likely inspire the thought, “Is that how he thinks of me, or will??” Because of your logical response, you’re continuing this topic of conversation, which is not the best idea. It’s not a stretch that her next response might be something like, “Am I someone who is nothing serious too?” Or something of that nature. Instead, try the better response below. Better, “Game” Response:​ ​“Are you getting possessive already haha” Zero logic. You aren’t even answering the question. Playful, and taking control of the direction of the conversation. Instead of a serious conversation of your past or current encounters with women, you’re smiling, she’s smiling....much better.

Keeping your cool, check. You’re not rattled by her, nor do you squelch her thought that you’re seeing other women, and that other women find you attractive. She can keep thinking that (which works in your favor), but she can keep thinking it as she invests in getting to know you more and talking to you.

Strategy #3 Reframe (“spin”) the comment positively to fit your frame. If someone pokes fun at you, spin it!! This is so much easier to do, in clever fashion, with Online Dating or text messaging. In person, you have to come up with something immediately, on the spot! But with Online Dating or text messaging, you can take your time to come up with a clever comeback. For instance, let’s say a woman makes fun of a man’s mode of exercise. This could come up through conversation in person, messaging over Online Dating, or text messaging.

Example Shit Test “You do CrossFit?? That’s for pussies!” Ouch…right? Well not really. She’s communicating with you, so that’s one Indicator of Interest. If messaging through an online dating app or text, she also took the time and effort to send you ​that message. So already you could have two indicators of interest. “Some” interest is always better than being ignored.

Many lesser individuals would respond something defensive like the following response. Incorrect Response:​ ​“Lots of guys do CrossFit! I’ve lost weight and gotten stronger. You should try it.” Logical response!!! Mistake right there. Taking the Shit Test seriously is also a mistake. It legitimizes whatever has been said. But there is no “winning” or “right” logical response here, remember, it’s all about ​how you respond, not actually what you say. Better, “Game” Response:​ ​“Duh! Of course CrossFit is for girls. Why do you think I go??” Is this response factual? Maybe. Maybe not. Who cares? It’s hilarious and cool. It also suggests some social IQ...at least, the way ​you explain it. And what woman wouldn’t smile when receive that response and be impressed with that comeback? Cool points, check. Instead of her imposing the frame that you’re a pussy, you’re exposing ​her as the lesser mind with a playful “Duh!” In her attempt to demean you as a pussy, you’ve taken her “diss” and reframed the comment as a compliment. Bravo. Whether she seriously believes you go to CrossFit because of girls doesn’t matter. ​What matters is not the content, but the delivery, which scores a perfect 10/10!

Strategy #4 Your response to a Shit Test must be unreactive and unconcerned with outcome. In your communication, it’s tempting to think you need to tell people what you think they want to hear, ​but you don’t. What communicates value is someone who is true to themselves first. When you’re too concerned with what someone thinks of you, it’s displayed in your reactiveness or attachment to outcome. You might answer questions that are inappropriate, defend yourself excessively, display your butthurtness to the Shit Test, or participate in actions that don’t interest you. For example, you might endure a boring conversation about something you don’t want to talk about, or do some activity that you would never do if it was up to you. All because you fear screwing things up. But when you are reacting in this way, you’re basically putting someone you don’t know, or barely know, on a pedestal. You’re treating them as if they are more important than you. You care what they think about you too much. What you’re displaying is how little you respect yourself, which is ​very unattractive. ​This is actually how you screw things up. Instead, when dealing with a Shit Test, you should be unreactive and unconcerned with outcome.

Example Shit Test “I’ll bet you say that to all the girls/guys.” Incorrect Response:​ Anything where you’re legitimizing the Shit Test and trying to explain your actions or positions seriously or logically because you don’t want to screw things up. Examples: ● “No I don’t.” ● “I just thought of it, it’s not a line or anything.” ● “Well I didn’t know what else to say.” ● “I thought of that just for you.” ● “I really mean it.” All you’re doing here is legitimizing someone else’s “power” position over you. You’re saying, “You’re the boss.” Do you think anyone finds it attractive when you let them walk all over you within minutes of knowing you, or early in getting to know each other? Better “Game” Response:​ ​“I didn’t give it that much thought but ok. Why do you look like the kid in school that ate glue on a dare??” Does not legitimize the Shit Test. The response given downplays the Shit Test. ​Unreactive and unconcerned with outcome. Is this even a clever or witty response? No. But again, remember it’s not ​what you say, but ​how you say it. Changing the topic, directing the conversation. Few people will actually notice, even fewer will call you out on it. Guess what she’s going to pay most attention to? The ending. “What?? Glue? Oh my God I would never eat glue blah blah blah blah blah.” And...you’re talking about something else. Booyah.

The answer is for sure not some clever, witty, charming response...but it doesn’t have to be. If you cared about outcome more, you would have been reactive in some way, but you didn’t display any behavior trying too hard.

Game Fundamental Being unreactive in real life, or online, is simple, but complex. It requires emotional mastery, as well as mastery of the self-image, who you believe yourself to be. Note:​ If a Shit Test reveals an excessive response…it touches an area of your life you are uncomfortable with, and feel the need to explain, defend, or justify. You are providing evidence to the validity of the concern/criticism. You have failed the Shit Test, and your self-image needs work.

Strategy #5 Embrace, feed into, and/or exaggerate your response to the Shit Test. By embracing, feeding into, and even exaggerating the Shit Test challenge, you remove its power.

Example Shit Test “​You must have a lot of girls wanting to date you, huh?” Incorrect Response: ​“Not really, I haven’t been on a date in months, actually.”

A logical, truthful, too-much-information giving response. You barely know this person. They have no right to this information. Nor does it paint you in a good light, “I haven’t been on a date in months.” Anyone would be thinking, “Well what’s wrong with this person??” Further, they probably didn’t expect such a specific, truthful answer! What a direct, logical response. Big mistake. Better, “Game” Response:​ ​“Yeah, but it’s only because my standards are so low hahaha” Is it a logical, expected answer? No. Is it funny? Absolutely. And no, she won’t take this answer seriously. Though the “hahaha” is a calculated effort to ensure this. Use “hahaha” to soften the things you say, or to ensure in communication someone knows you intend it jokingly or playfully. Will ​most people receiving that response smile? Yes. What does it display? It displays confidence, playfulness, and displays the cool confidence to not feel the need to seriously answer a question to someone that you don’t know that well (or else they would know that answer). You owe them nothing. A playful answer is absolutely appropriate. (Actually, their asking is actually more socially inappropriate.) Exaggerating the challenge or criticism is an “alpha” behavior that, instead of shying from attention, draws even more attention to what was said. Who would do such a thing? Someone unafraid to let the topic have attention. Displaying this ability is much like a comedy. When we don’t believe something is negatively true about us (negatively valid), we can laugh

about it. It’s absurd, because we are certain it doesn’t mesh with our self-image of who we really are.

Strategy #6 Move on from the Shit Test topic. You’re under no obligation to talk about whatever someone else decides. Sure, you can respond, but it doesn’t have to further the topic at hand. If you present value in your response and promote a different conversational direction, people will generally follow along, because the value you’re offering is in their best interest. Additionally, calling someone out on changing the topic would be socially inappropriate, because you can’t really prove intent. “Hey!! You didn’t directly answer my question!!” That makes things awkward, right? So people won’t really call you out on it. It makes ​them the social leper.

Example Shit Test “How many dates have you gone out on from this site?” Incorrect Response:​ Anything where you’re logically, truthfully, and seriously responding. Nobody actually wants to know the exact answer, even if they think they do. If you answer seriously…guess what you’re going to continue talking about? The answer to the Shit test! Anything other than moving on from this topic is an incorrect response.

Better Game Response:​ ​“Well let’s see, carry the ten…wait, how many zeros are there in a million?? haha are you afraid of a little competition??” Was it logical or serious? No. ​

Did the response legitimize the Shit Test? No. Calm confidence on display? Yes. ​

Humorous? Yes. Changing of topic, guiding the conversation’s direction. CHECK!

Wrapping Up There’s a lot more to Shit Tests than you thought, right? Beyond the knowledge of Shit Tests you have now been exposed to, I want to ensure that you have the tools and resources you may need as you continue along your path. This free ebook, “How to Pass Shit Tests” is actually just one section of another ebook, “The Get Game Group Guide to Online Dating.” So if you think Shit Tests were broken down thoroughly, you should definitely check out the most thorough guide to Online Dating there is! EVERYTHING is covered, including ​all my online dating tips, advice, and secrets. You can find it, along with other ebooks in the upcoming “Products” section. In the concluding sections, our free resources are listed, as are the ways you can connect with Get Game Group over social media, like joining our Facebook groups. Also listed are the products and services Get Game Group offers, in case any are a fit for your needs. Now having read this ebook, I know you certainly have a much better grasp of Shit Tests. If there’s something else you are looking for help with, first check out our available resources, products, and services. I might have already addressed it in an article, YouTube video, or as a product/service. But if I haven’t, or you just want to reach out and message me, send me an email, I’d like to hear from you.

- Mario, the “GetGameGuy” CEO and Dating Coach at Get Game Group Dating Coaching [email protected]

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Table of Contents Link http://getgamegroup.com/see-table-contents-guide-online-dating/

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